I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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