how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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