i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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