Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
kristin has been a bad kristin
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
