Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
