Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
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