Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
