He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
