You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
