Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
How does one acquire holy water?
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
