Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize