I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
