Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize
