i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
