Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?

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(513): I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious? http://tfl.nu/32zi

Replies (9) Good night (845) Bad night (1372)
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(416): View more from Ontario

i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .

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(416): i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high . http://tfl.nu/d43n

Replies (17) Good night (3002) Bad night (605)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein

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(412): waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein http://tfl.nu/1rbx

Replies (36) Good night (5176) Bad night (809)
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(316): View more from Kansas

My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.

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(316): My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch. http://tfl.nu/qemq

Replies (15) Good night (1283) Bad night (4321)
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(231): View more from Michigan

Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"

(231): View more from Michigan

OMG its one we used last night

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(231): Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing" (231): OMG its one we used last night http://tfl.nu/jpyf

Replies (19) Good night (1173) Bad night (9302)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.

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(843): Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean. http://tfl.nu/s35t

Replies (9) Good night (4721) Bad night (1133)
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(386): View more from Florida

It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.

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(386): It's like God was speaking to me through a penis. http://tfl.nu/n7ui

Replies (12) Good night (3401) Bad night (1156)
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(315): View more from New York

i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee

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(315): i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee http://tfl.nu/vhng

Replies (8) Good night (2016) Bad night (622)
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(604): View more from British Columbia

Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"

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(604): Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!" http://tfl.nu/of5t

Replies (1) Good night (1096) Bad night (464)
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(217): View more from Illinois

Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual

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(217): Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual http://tfl.nu/ib6l

Replies (2) Good night (616) Bad night (369)
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(647): View more from Ontario

I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.

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(647): I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks. http://tfl.nu/gjaq

Replies (4) Good night (1114) Bad night (441)
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(310): View more from California

Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).

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(310): Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok). http://tfl.nu/yawu

Replies (2) Good night (919) Bad night (378)
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(646): View more from New York

Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!

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(646): Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth! http://tfl.nu/4hup

Replies (5) Good night (2016) Bad night (384)
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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool

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(403): Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool http://tfl.nu/mskr

Replies (4) Good night (316) Bad night (586)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.

(1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.

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(570): If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit. (1-570): As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no. http://tfl.nu/hlm9

Replies (4) Good night (1284) Bad night (452)

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