Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
This is my gift to your gina
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize