the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
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I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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