Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
