While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
