She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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