Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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