i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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