I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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