This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
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I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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