I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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