I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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