apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
