I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
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