just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
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