Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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