Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
