First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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