Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize