Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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