How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
