It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
