is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
