She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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