Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
