look no pants
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
