in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
