i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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