she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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