I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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