What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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