Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
