i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
My vagina just recognized that song.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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