did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize