Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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