Need sex. Gaining weight.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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