I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Randomize
