Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize